A fellow teacher's blog

Check it out...
http://mymeremotif. blogspot. com/

Spelling 101

Open Scene
Kindergarten students are lined up, ready to go back to class. Miss Jumpa quizzes them on spelling to keep them from bouncing into the walls and damaging things.

Miss Jumpa: D-O-G
Students:DOG!
Miss Jumpa: B-O-A-T
Students: BOAT!
Miss Jumpa: U-N-I-V-E-R-S-I-T-Y
Students: uhhhhh....*pause*
Little girl in front: LADYBUG!!!! * High fives kid behind her*

End Scene

Yoga for the Second Grade Soul

Spring Break is over.

The children are off the CHAIN.

And not in the good way.

My 2nd graders come to me straight from recess. Not conducive to learning or teaching art. The only thing it's good for is raising my blood pressure to the point of steam literally coming out of my ears.

So last week I decided to teach some of them yoga to chill them out a little.

We all sat in the lotus position and practiced breathing.

They already knew how to take me out of my "happy place" by humming OMMMMMMMMMMM at the top of their lungs. One little girl told me that I "better get it tight, better get it right" if I was to find me a man.

Yes, I'm aware that I am becoming that art teacher that does yoga in class and talks about negative energy and happy places. I have accepted this. I refuse, however, to wear gauzy peasant shirts and Birkenstocks. I REFUSE, DO YOU HEAR ME?!

Advice-Part 1

My first piece of advice for all you future teachers-in-the-hood would be to act farking insane on the first day of school. What I mean is stare wide-eyed at the kids when they ask you questions, get on your desk and yell at "the man" for stealing your identity, and eat pencil shavings for lunch.
No one will eff with you for the rest of the year.
NO ONE.